[Verse 1] Once that you’ve decided on a killing   First you make a stone of your heart   And if you find that your hands are still willing Then you can turn a murder into art          [Verse 2] There really isn’t any need for bloodshed You just do it with a little more finesse If you can slip a tablet into someone’s coffee      F#7#9        Fmaj7#11     Bm7 Then it avoids an awful lot of mess [Chorus] It’s     murder by numbers one two three                                It’s as easy to learn as your            Murder by numbers one two three                                  It’s as easy to learn as your            [Verse 3] Now if you have a taste for this experience   And you’re flushed with your very first success     Then you must try a twosome or a threesome And you’ll find your conscience bothers you much less        [Verse 4] Because murder is like anything you take to      It’s a habit-forming need for more and more      You can bump off every member of your family         F#7#9        Fmaj7#11   Bm7 And anybody else you find a bore [Chorus] Because it’s    murder by numbers one two three                                It’s as easy to learn as your            Murder by numbers one two three                                  It’s as easy to learn as your            [Verse 5] Now you can join the ranks of the illustrious In history’s great dark hall of fame     All our greatest killers were industrious At least the ones that we all know by name      [Verse 6] But you can reach the top of your profession     If you become the leader of the land     For murder is the sport of the elected                    F#7#9            Fmaj7#11     Bm7 And you don’t need to lift a finger of your hand [Chorus] Because it’s    murder by numbers one two three                                It’s as easy to learn as your            Murder by numbers one two three                                  It’s as easy to learn as your                      [Interlude]         one two three                                 one two three               B7(#5b9#9)/ch] [           [Chorus] Murder by numbers one two three                                It’s as easy to learn as your            Murder by numbers one two three                                            / It’s as easy to learn as your