The Table - by The Beautiful South (CAPO ON 1st FRET) [Verse 1] This table has four sturdy legs A heart of very near wild oak When others would have screamed out loud my friend This one never even spoke    [CHORUS] I’ve been sat upon oohh I’ve been spat upon oohh I’ve been treated like a bed Been carried like a stretcher when someone thinks they’re dead I’ve been dined upon oohh I’ve been wined upon oohh I’ve been taken for a fool Taken for a desk when they should have been at school [Verse 2] This table’s been pushed against the door When tempers well tempers flare at night Banged upon with knuckles clenched my friend When someone thinks that they are right [CHORUS] I’ve been sat upon oohh I’ve been spat upon oohh I’ve been treated like a bed Been carried like a stretcher when someone thinks they’re dead I’ve been dined upon oohh I’ve been wined upon oohh I’ve been taken for a fool Taken for a desk when they should have been at school [Bridge] Tables only turn when tables learn Put me on a bonfire watch me burn Treat me with some dignity don’t treat me like a slave Or I’ll turn into the coffin in your grave [CHORUS] I’ve been sat upon oohh I’ve been spat upon oohh I’ve been treated like a bed Been carried like a stretcher when someone thinks they’re dead I’ve been dined upon oohh I’ve been wined upon oohh I’ve been taken for a fool Taken for a desk when they should have been at school [Bridge] Tables only turn when tables learn Put me on a bonfire watch me burn Treat me with some dignity don’t treat me like a slave Or I’ll turn into the coffin in your grave