[Intro]        [Verse 1] I was impressed like everyone When man began to fly Out of earthly regions To planets in the sky. With total media coverage We watched the heroes land As ceremoniously They disturbed the cosmic sand. [Verse 2] In awe with admiration We listened to the talk. Such pride felt they Such joy to be Upon the moon to walk. My romantic vision shattered When it was explained to me Spacemen wear old diapers In which they shit and pee. [Chorus] Oh the intergalactic laxative Will get you from here to there. Relieve you and believe me Without a worry or care. If shitting is your problem When you’re out there in the stars Oh the intergalactic laxative Will get you from here to Mars. [Verse 3] They don’t partake like you and I Of beefy burger mush. Their food is specially prepared To dissolve into slush. Absorbed by multi-fibers In the super diaper suit Otherwise the slush would trickle Down inside the boot. [Chorus] Oh the intergalactic laxative Will get you from here to there. Relieve you and believe me Without a worry or care. If shitting is your problem When you’re out there in the stars Oh the intergalactic laxative Will get you from here to Mars. [Verse 4] You may well ask now what becomes Of liquid they consume. A pipe is led from penis head To a unit in the room. The water is recirculated Filtered for re-use. In case of anti-gravity - Pee gets on the loose. [Chorus] Oh the intergalactic laxative Will get you from here to there. Relieve you and believe me Without a worry or care. If shitting is your problem When you’re out there in the stars Oh the intergalactic laxative Will get you from here to Mars. [Verse 5] Wherever man has conquered On the quest for frontiers new da da da da I’m glad he’s always had to do The number one and two. It makes it all so ordinary Just like you and me To know the greatest heroes They had to shit and pee. [Outro] The intergalactic laxative Will get you from here to there For cosmic constipation There’s none that can compare. If shitting is your problem When you’re out there in the stars Oh the intergalactic laxative The intergalactic laxative The intergalactic laxative Will get you from here to Mars.